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In the early months of being a new mother, I desperately craved time with other moms. I was searching for a mom posse where parenting tips were exchanged freely and funny mom stories were shared frequently. A safe place where moms could be comfortable asking questions, like “will my nipples ever be normal-sized again?”
Soon, I became blessed with wonderful mommy friendships and loads of sweet toddler friends for Violet. I’d barely learned how to remove breastmilk stains off my clothes before birthday party invites began taking over my fridge door like locusts on a wheat field.
So, you better believe when I heard about the sweeping birthday party trend called “fiver parties,” I shouted, thank you universe!
The “fiver party” is an easy solution for both attendees and hosts when it comes to the huge age-old birthday gift dilemma. Instead of buying gifts, guests are simply asked to bring five dollars for the birthday kid. The money is then thrown together in a pot to buy one big gift that the child really wants or needs.
I think whoever came up with this idea is ridiculously amazing! The moms that harbor strong feelings against the fiver party trend, hear me out.
Here are 5 damn good reasons why you should host a “fiver” birthday party for your child (including how to word a fiver party invitation).
1. Saves time
No more searching on Google, Amazon, and Pinterest for hours to find an age-old appropriate gift only for it to end up in the dump pile Mom started ever since she started watching Marie Kondo on Netflix. For those day-of party shoppers, no wandering aisles at Target analyzing each toy and pondering if the child already has it. Pop a $5 bill in a card. Viola! You’re done. How convenient is that?
2. Saves money
The sum of all those gifts for children’s birthday parties adds up…like a lot! Don’t even get me started on the baby showers and sprinkles (who can resist dropping a whole paycheck on adorable baby clothes, right?!) 20 bucks here, $30 there, another $25 next weekend. Before you know it, there goes mama’s self-care budget aka her daily coffee run and we all know us mamas cannot survive without good strong coffee damn it!
3. Sparks creativity
A fiver party allows the guest to get even more creative with the card and how the gift is presented. Your child can pour his or her little heart in crafting a one-of-a-kind card for their little buddy and can even incorporate the $5 into the card decoration. Hello, fun origami art!
4. Involves less clutter
Less is more. Your child has enough toys. You know this. I know this. Your family knows this. The whole wide world knows this! Plus, you just halved your kid’s toy collection with a bag drop at Salvation Army and just made a chunk of money with the big-ticket items on Facebook Marketplace. Don’t reverse all that your hard work. Clutter causes major anxiety. Maintain your sanity, mama.
5. More appreciation
Your mom friends will love you for it. Your child will be happy they can choose a gift they really want. And, you will be happy to have less clutter and less of a mess to clean up. And honestly, your kid really just wants to eat and play with their friends, not be forced to sit on a chair for 30 minutes with everyone awkwardly looking at them hoping the child appreciates the gift they tried so hard to find.
Amy McCready, author of The Me, Me, Me Epidemic: A Step-by-Step Guide to Raising Capable, Grateful Kids in an Over-Entitled World, suggests using the following wording for your child’s fiver birthday party invitation:
“We’re trying to help [NAME] focus on the joy of celebrating this special occasion with her cherished friends rather than on receiving gifts.
To that end, we hope you’ll consider NO GIFTS. For those who feel uncomfortable with that, we ask you consider NO MORE THAN a $5 gift card or cash that she can put towards something special she’s saving for. Thanks for understanding and celebrating with us.”
Hosting a fiver party helps children focus less on the material things, and more on the important stuff, the experience of their birthday. This is what birthdays should really be about after all, right?
“With fiver parties, parents and close relatives can still give the child a few gifts, and friends can help contribute to a larger coveted item or experience,” says McCready.
By hosting a fiver party, you’re increasing the chances of your child’s little friends coming to play, eat, and celebrate their special friend. Way more meaningful than a bag of toys that will likely be forgotten by next week, don’t you think? The parents of your mini guests will also be grateful to attend a party without suffering financial strain.
If fiver parties became the new norm, the cluster of party invites on the side of my fridge wouldn’t seem so daunting. The “fiver party” is truly the way to go for both attendees and tired, budget-conscious moms everywhere.
This is an excellent idea! I am all about it. Looking forward to hosting a party like this in the future.
I LOVE this idea! I’m very into the no gift idea, even though I absolutely love presents haha. I tend toward allowing grandparents to get presents (because they will whether I want them to or not – they are also much more likely to either get a high quality gift, or clothing/other things we need) and telling friends not to worry about it! 🙂 If my son ever feels left out by not getting gifts, we might have to use this idea. I think it’s a great way to get the focus off the presents, but still get them something they love.
Totally same! The Grandparents definitely wouldn’t follow it, but for little toddler friends and friends of family, I’d rather they just come to celebrate the birthday girl/boy and not worry about buying things. Kid’s have more than enough these days. 🙏